The First Step

She was lying on a bed, her tears absorbed by the soft pillows. She could hear the chanting of mantras, associated with the intense incense smell. Each and every family member except her,of course, was there praying with heart and soul for a baby boy. She couldn't participate even if she wanted to. Her bed is her only place. She is a patient of paraplegia from birth. She is paralyzed hip down.

  The housemaid said that her parents had also done a great prayer ceremony before her birth for a son. The priest had said that according to her parents horoscope they will only have daughters and only a perfect ritual sacrifice can change their fate. When she was born, that too paralyzed, the family was not only shocked but also her mother had to face a lot of humiliations. She was the burden. Nobody bothered to give her a name.

   The priest said there was fault in the previous ritual. So another ritual must be performed. She was mostly kept under the house maid’s care with her mother's occasional visits. She hardly remembered her father. Her mother is pregnant. Hopefully this is a boy. She was not crying for herself. She was crying that she could not participate in the prayers for a brother. “ Surely God will listen to my parents this time isn't it bai?” she asked. Bai said, “hopefully.” Bai didn't like the unfair treatment of this girl by the Mehra family. Why punish this girl? 

 Suddenly screams could be heard from the prayer room. The bai went to investigate. 

   “Fire! Fire!” That's what she heard. “ There is fire.” she was horrified. The bai came to the door. “This fire is uncontrollable,” she shouted. “We have to get out of this house let me bring her.” “ No said Mr Mehra, “No time for that. Bringing her out is difficult and risky to all our lives, just come out.” she heard everything. She wasn't hurt because she thought she had nothing worth living. She would always want her family to be safe. Ironically she never criticized her family for anything. She always thought a day will come when she will be loved by her family. “ Perhaps I will never see that day but please save my family.” She made a silent prayer.The fire has reached her room the heat was surrounding her. She could feel the intense heat and her eyes burnt from the smoke. Death is perhaps not that easy. As the heat increased she automatically had u r g e s to move. Something burning fell on her feet she shrieked and for the first time pulled her leg towards her left a little.At first she didn't realise what she did but then she could move her leg a bit more. The smoke entered her lungs and she coughed badly and as her feet was already hurt in midst of trying to move and coughing she fell from her bed.

  This was her first movement. With lot of force she crawled towards the door and clutched whatever she could and stood up. She was on her two feet. Unbelievable but true. “ Help us! Please help us.” That was Mrs mehra's voice. “Mother” she called. Her mother, is in trouble, she tried to move forward but her legs trembled. Stumbling and gathering whatever she could she took her first step. With immense will power she continued moving. She could hear her mother's screams,it was coming from the adjacent room. The door had somehow got locked and though paralyzed she knew how to open a door. With lot of difficulty she tried to open the door in midst of the increasing engulfing fire. At last she managed and pushed open the door. Mrs Mehera couldn't believe her eyes. Her paralyzed daughter came to her rescue when they were leaving her there to die . She ran and carried the almost fainting girl and anyhow manage to come out. The whole Mehra family was there,tensed,some crying. When they heard about this story they were overjoyed. The neighbors considered this a miracle. A doctor was called and also the fire brigade. The fire was from the ritual. While checkup the doctor asked “what's your name brave girl ?” Bewildered she looked at her bai. She never had a name. 

 “Agnija” said Mr Mehra, his voice croaked, “my daughter Agnija, “ she looked at th all forgotten girl. Today she saved his wife and the unborn child for whom all this prayers were done. “Yes! Agnija” said Mr Mehra’s mother. “Today is her new birth, born from the fire. “Gradually everyone hugged her, her mother kissed her cheeks and forehead. There was lot of praises. “Brave girl,” “Angel,” “God's gift.” everyone was muttering. Finally her dreams came true. She is being loved, cared and praised, but today she somehow didn't enjoy it. All these praises against all those she heard for 15 years of her life made fierce friction. “ Cursed, “ Weak,” “ Unlucky” was what she used to. She is not Agnija no she wasn't born today, she stood up, moved away from the gathered people. “No,”her voice came out, “I am not Agnija, I am the unamed cursed Anami.”